Episode Description

In which Professor X is (canonically!) a jerk, Miles has Sidrian Hunter feelings, Kitty Pryde is Clarissa Darling with a dragon, we introduce a drinking game, the X-Men do Barbarella, Rachel has a ‘shipper moment, Rogue joins the team, Storm gets a haircut, Mastermind is still the worst, and Madelyne Pryor is underrated.

Cold OpenEdit

Lockheed is explained.


  • Lockheed
  • Uncanny X-Men #168-175
  • Reset issues
  • A one-sided rivalry
  • The lowest-drama X-romance
  • The Cream of Wheat box as a metaphor for infinity
  • Kitty’s Kostume Korner
  • Rachel’s questionably-canon ships
  • The Morlocks
  • Class privilege and the mutant metaphor
  • Callisto
  • Caliban
  • Sunder
  • Plague
  • Masque
  • A dubbing error
  • Gender dimorphism in superhero media
  • Storm’s first major character arc
  • Our single favorite superhero artist
  • Rogue
  • Rogue’s accent
  • A Charles Xavier we can believe in
  • Yukio
  • Punk Storm
  • Madelyne Pryor
  • Closure
  • Cyclops vs. formalwear

Listener QuestionsEdit

  • Rogue was raised by Mystique and Destiny, neither of whom appear to have the colorful language and thick accent that Rogue does. So where did Rogue get it from?
  • Is there an in-­canon (or out ­off ­canon) term to describe those middleground mutants? Those who fall somewhere between mutants who can "pass" for homo sapiens, and those who we'd describe as Morlocks?

Art ChallengeEdit

Kitty Pryde costume redesigns any era, any codename